I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I wish I only lived at night.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
