their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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