"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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