SEEEEXXX PLEASE
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
