My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
