Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
