He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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