Christians are straight up FREAKS
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
