You're so nebulous sometimes
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
