so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
