sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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