you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
