i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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