Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
