I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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