Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
