Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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