yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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