I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
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