i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I just found puke in my bra..
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
