The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
