Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize