we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize