i just google imaged poop.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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