Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
