i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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