First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
