"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I think my moral compass just broke
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
