If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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