Christians are straight up FREAKS
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
