Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
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Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
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I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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