this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
