Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
