We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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