Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
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Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
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but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I supernannyed him into submission
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