White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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