For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
