they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
