My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
