we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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