Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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