I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
