sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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