I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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