i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Fuck appropriateness.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
