Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
