I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize