ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize