no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
