She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
